Lost thoughts - attempt at bad poetry :)

two decades millions of thoughts drowning in self doubt two decades thousands of hate words I said to myself two decades hundreds of days to unlearn to hate me two decades five people who knows who I wanna be two decades one life to hate which's mine right now two decades zero reasons to hate who I was two decades infinite ways to love who I am how much longer to connect the life I want to myself...

they feel longer than they lived they keep me going still sometimes the only fix feels burrowed from someone's wit some bubbly girl in her bubble who lived them like a wish as she hears her name by a dear voice her gut melts a storm of butterflies a spring of memories we travelled in from the past hope they fade away hope they always stay hope they melt my gut again hope they never repeat hope it's a lucid dream to get lost and walk through hope I find my peace in it the day I can let go